During these colder months, it is important to take some time to self reflect and see in what ways you have gotten closer to yourself in the past year. Getting closer to yourself means, hearing your own needs, communicating them, setting boundaries when you need to, and just honoring the spirit that you are. Different stages of the year offer different expressions of self. Winter is a collective time of going inward, slowing down, resting and self reflecting. Are you giving yourself that time? Yes, it is a productive thing to do to rest. It helps your psyche to process the year before stepping foot into the next cycle. Spring, a time of setting intention, planting the seeds, and cultivating your hopes and dreams. Summer is a time of getting out there and getting things done, Fall a time of harvesting the fruit of your labor, and Winter again is a time to rest, reflect so that you can start anew. These are the particular energies offered by Mother Nature, and if we can tune in to take care of ourselves accordingly, we will feel more alive and aligned. Sending love warmth and peace to all who are reading this post. Remember to slow down, cozy up, and take care of your self… Happy Holidays to All..
Happy 2021
New Year, New You.
What does this phrase actually mean, and why do we so often use this?
Well, what a great feeling it is to know that we can turn a page in the year, and have an opportunity to start again. Whether it is a project, personal goal, or life visions for yourself. While it may not necessarily mean that a “new you” is formed, because frankly that would almost be impossible, but the “idea” of “starting over” can feeling tremendously uplifting and inspiring. Out with the old, In with the new. While many of the 2020 themes will carry over into the New Year, we can give meaning to these themes and begin again with Hope.
A few self reflective questions to think about:
What did you learn in 2020 that will be useful for you to carry over into the next chapter of year life? Any coping tools? Realizations you had about yourself, relationships, your family, community, culture, world?
What would you like to let go of? Any self-limiting thoughts?
What challenges did you overcome in 2020 and what strengths did you discover about yourself and your resiliency?
What are some dreams that you would like to have the chance to cultivate again? Perhaps a dream you had when you were a child and never got the chance in your life to attend to ? How will you plant a seed in the current moment?
How do you imagine cultivating joy and connection in 2021?
How do you imagine handling challenges in 2021, what are your resources?
Who are some people you look up to, who inspire you, and how can you bring these elements of inspiration into the New Year?
While the great unknown of the future remains ahead of us, the great known of the past offers tremendous amount of knowledge, tools, and seeds, to cultivate a life that is in balance and harmony with who you truly are.
Let’s continue to grow together, as we nourish each other and our planet along the way. Happy New Year.
5 Steps toward Creating Connection with your Self
1) Listen to your needs, don’t ignore your internal cues. If you ignore yourself, the less you will know what you need, or want from life. Ignoring needs also increases anxiety and indecisiveness.
2) Practice saying “no” to others. Setting a boundary is important in cultivating and protecting your energy, and sense of self. While society/culture/family may have taught that saying “yes” is kind and saying “no” is unkind, the truth is that every time you say “yes” against your own will, you not only get further away from who you truly are, but hurt yourself in the process of “pleasing” others. This self “sacrifice” and “abandonment” can add up over time and increase symptoms of depression, isolation, and disconnection from self and then from others.
3) Lower the volume of the critical voice within. Most people have a “critical voice” within that will criticize the internal self with negative comments, such as “you are not good enough” “you can’t do it” “stop being who you are so you can fit in” and many other negative comments. These are all statements in the mind that do not help in thriving, and living with purpose and meaning. Pay attention to your internal dialogue, and lower the volume of such criticisms. Because frankly, they are not based on any truth, and only minimize your sense of self-worth.
4) Love yourself. This means increasing the volume of kind comments toward your body, mind and emotions. It’s important to remember that you are a unique individual, and no one on this planet can be you. Love yourself. Practice “thanking” your body for being there for you every day, and doing the best it can to function so that you can experience the physical world. You are beautiful, standards defined by society/culture/family are only “labels” that can take you away from accepting who you really are, and seeing and embracing your beauty and vitality. Practice thanking your mind, for taking care of yourself, and thinking and computing all day, and dreaming at night. Your mind is a wonderful tool, but it is not all of you, so don’t get stuck there for too long. Appreciate its strength. Practice thanking and validating your feelings. Feelings are profound expressions of yourself that will take you as close to your truth as possible, don’t mark them as “unimportant.” Denying feelings, is a form of self-denial, which can increase anxiety, and internal states of disconnection. Mindfully observe and feel your emotions, and know that they are like clouds. They always move on.
5) Stay curious. Your interests, desires, insights, and needs in life shift. You cannot pin yourself down and “be the same” for the rest of your life. You are constantly evolving and shifting, know that it is “ok” to change your mind. Commit to life experiences that help you evolve and grow. Seek psychotherapy for self-exploration and discovery. Curiosity about your own Self can lead to treasures within that you may otherwise not stumble upon.
10 Helpful Tips to cope with COVID-19 stressors
1) Mainatain your communication with friends and family. Use virtual apps that help you to physically see the people who you love. While maintaining a physical distance is tough, the needs of emotional connection can be met via technology. Feelings of isolation and loneliness are detrimental to one’s overall health, and maintaining contact will increase your overall wellbeing.
2) Limit News Exposure. Stay informed, yet remain mindful to avoid getting “consumed” by media sources. Draw good boundaries in which you protect your mental health. You can limit news exposure to 10 minutes a day.
3) Read, watch, listen to inspirational stories and talks. Inspiration can ignite hope, and creativity, these are all important sources of nourishment for mental and physical health.
4) Eat foods that are full of life source. This is direct energy from the Earth. Also stay hydrated and get some sun if you can.
5) Create. Cook, write, draw, sing, play music, dance and exercise. These can prevent internal “stagnation” from growing.
6) Make 5 year, 10 year plans. What would you like to see in your life? How would you like to live your life? Planting the seeds for the longterm future can help cope with the current limitations, and changes.
7) Feel your feelings. Everyone has a different response to current world events, and yours is unique to you.
8) Keep dreaming and visualizing, create a vision board, this one goes with #6. The long term vision can create a roadmap and give structure to an otherwise unstructured present life. This can also give you a bird’s eye view to your life.
9) Honor your daily rhythms and routines, create your own structure to your day. Your routine does not have to reflect other people’s, there is no “right” way.
10) Know that you are not alone, if you feel alone, contact and connect. Here is a source for CA residents, if you are in another state, research and see what your state offers:
The free service is available to anyone who calls or texts the California Peer-Run Warm Line at 1-855-845-7415.
The line will be staffed Monday through Friday from 7 a.m. until 11 p.m., Saturdays from 7 a.m. until 3 p.m. and Sundays from 7 a.m. until 9 p.m.
